0:00:00 – Opening
0:15:25 – Darryl Cooper from Martyr Made.
2:39:34 – Final thoughts and take-aways.
2:40:17 – How to stay on THE PATH.
3:07:26 – Closing Gratitude.
224: In An Uncertain World, Stack The Deck In Your Favor. With Darryl Cooper.
April 8, 2020
|In Podcast Episodes
Hi Jocko, Echo, and Darryl,
I was just introduced to Darryl Cooper while listening to this episode of the Podcast and I am fascinated by his story – particularly his nomadic and unpredictable childhood. I am a middle school teacher who has found her calling and passion in this line of work, but who also struggles to support, and frankly understand, many students who come from unstable homes. I was very fortunate in my upbringing and am aware of the biases I carry as a result of that. And while I am always striving to learn and better myself, so that I may be better for the students I serve, I routinely feel as though I fall short – whether it be taking behaviors personally, becoming overwhelmed by the enormity of daily responsibilities, allowing my emotions to get the best of me, or even just failing at creating a foundational relationship.
Listening to Darryl’s story provided many precious insights and perspectives into why students who suffer from childhood trauma behave the way they do, and I am going to recommend that all of my colleagues listen to this episode. I was left with a question though, and perhaps the nature of human emotion and behavior will not lend itself to a single answer, but I’m wondering if Darryl could explain what would have had, or did have, the most positive impact on his experience in school when it came to his teachers? What did he get from them, or felt like he needed from them, to “succeed”? What made him, or would have made him feel, more welcome? What made, or would have made, the most impact?
I know there’s much to unpack here and obviously no two kids are the same – but behaviors related to trauma have some common threads and it is something us teachers face everyday in our classrooms; many feeling ill-equipped and undersupported to bearing such a burden. Any and all information is valuable information and I would consider it an honor to hear any thoughts on this topic.
Respectfully,
Danielle Kuhl
This is an interesting one. I would like to say that I know people who were in a deeper hole and managed to get out and not have long-term issues. Its ok to feel proud of your achievements and still acknowledge that luck played a role. I think I have a different perspective on this than other ppl, but in general I don’t like fatalism.
I would say it would be more useful to find ways to improve situations than be mad at the system. Too much about this guy says “gamer”, and I would say I get why seeing the world as a game might be useful coming from a bad background, but its not the only way. Good to know he mostly moved past it, i would be interested in hearing more about that. I tend not to trust ppl who turn that way. To me, it seems like accepting defeat. Life dealt you bad cards but that doesn’t mean you can’t have all the normal things other people have. You don’t need glory to make up for the negative stuff. Its not your negative. If you start paying people tho you will end up making enemies you don’t need to. Its not someone else’s job to fix you, and most ppl don;t like being played. If anyone turned that on you, you wouldn’t like it either. Find a way to be in control and get yourself what you need out of life without making it into a game.
The kid who was beig taught how to shoot up places by his family member, you can walk away, you can call the cops, you can do other things.
The crap story is hilarious but I don’t 100% beleve it, I kinda think it was exaggerated at least, same as the 3 days to ship out after joining part. I kinda wondered if the test scores were exagerated too :P. But over all I can say I enjoyed it. And its OK to READ a lot. Everything can potentially be a pathology to generally I don’t think most people are anywhere near that. I definitely get the “I wasn’t there, bc my nose was in a book” thing. I find that its pretty common in universities especially. Knowledge has always been power >:).
I don’t think that thing about trying to see the sisters death in a different way will work, but I get the impulse to try to deal with your emotions by using your brain to override them. In my experience it doesn’t work, but it can help you function beter in the short term.
Future request: Could Jocko talk more about the book writing process? (for broke people)
I would like to see guests which are experts in cyber security if you can find any :). They’ve been talking about cyber attacks and hackers a lot but the conversation has no real structure and very little sense of solving the issues. Not everyone wants to join the bad guys.
And maybe do differen types? With a specific focus on how to deal with attacks which modify text. I cannot stress enough that i don’t mean to give ppl excuses for not thinkng before they hit send, or anything like that. But you have to admit that that is not the only risk – google nokia simmons, for instance. It is not safe to ignore this. Not when everyone is putting everything online. Im not trying to freak anyone out, but there has to be a way forward – it can’t just be blind panic, or out of sight- out of mind. And maybe someone can explain what is going on with the GPS apps. I haven’t been able to get mine to fuction for years. It keeps malfuncioning. Its particulary worrying in the context of “self-driving cars”. I am very, very weary of posting anything like thse quesions publicly. I wouldn’t do it. And I’ll ask you not to as well, for now.
BUT, if I can share the questions and find solutions – maybe those solutions CAN be shared safely. You can’t let anyone able to hire a hacker have the upper hand either.
You don’t want to know what it feels like to be afraid to use the internet. No one can protect anyone else if they don’t have the tools. I can’t accept that. Give ppl the tools to protect themseves and those around them. Please.
It makes it impossible to live life. It makes it imposible to have normal relationships. Its a problem no one wants to acknowledge bc it undermines the system, most of the system. Which to me, just means I need to find another way to solve it. An indirect way perhaps. Most tech companies are in the US. Google, microsoft, etc are US companies.
Extreme ownership is leading to extreme frustration. Taking ownership is not hard at work, thats 8-12 hours a day then you go home and work can be left at work. Applying extreme ownership at home is very difficult when ones spouse rarely takes ownership. This is the ultimate test. Echo and Jocko, the self quarantine is testing the marriage. Extreme ownership being applied for a constant 24hours and never leaving the house is wearing the patience thin.